And So To the Nearby-Bar-In-The-Other-Town I Did Go,
In My Trusty ‘Horseless Carriage’.
Also known as its shortened name – a “Car”
This Is a regular saturday jaunt of mine,
I go from a one-horse-town,
To another one-horse-town.
Or perhaps I should update the phrase & say “I went to a one-car-town”.
These are mostly Shandy, Books & Coffee & Boob-watching trips –
& by ‘Boobs’ I unfortunately mean the ‘people’ kind.
Yes, most people suck, but occasionally you get lucky.
So, this particular time I sling into the usual regular bar –
a slightly old fashioned working mans bar, but owned by recent immigrants.
The two bartenders that are there are damned good guys,
Guys that you know have a real heart beating in their chests.
But the boss is too – let’s just say his vibe doesn’t fill me with confidence.
The good boys at the bar usually give me a good & fair shandy price,
But I make a mistake & ask the owner for the same drink.
He gives me the usual inflated price.
I tell him it’s too expensive –
I say “I usually get it for Six Fifty – surely you can’t charge me the same for a full beer”
I add that he doesn’t pay excise tax on the half of the glass that is lemonade.
The owner looks at ‘good guy one’ next to his shoulder and asks “what do you charge”
‘Good guy number one’ agrees & says “Six Fifty”.
So, the owner, backed into a corner backs down @ gives me my usual Six Fifty price shandy.
Five minutes later I order from the Boss again.
He rings up Eight dollars.
I say “what gives”,
He simply ignores good grace & says “it’s Eight Dollars”.
I regrettibly cough up – with the half protest of raising my hands up in the air while saying “ok ok”.
He pours it, I take it, I drink it.
I thought to myself “I’m probably not coming back next time”.
I found it amazing that the owner was willing to lose a regular customer,
Just to save the one & a half dollars of an overpriced shandy.
That owner boob only valued my regular custom at $1.50.
I paid it anyway & drank it & left.
After I left, I thought about not coming back,
Then I felt extra sorry for those two good guys behind the bar.
I thought to myself “I really should help them get new jobs”.
As I left the stormy day suddenly turned sunny & drove home.
I thought to myself
“If only there were more bars in one-horse-towns”.
Then my actions could have a chance to live up to my principles & intensions.
Yes Siree! You sure give up a lot when drinking overpriced shandys in one-horse-towns.